You see, the approximately six foot tall tree had rocks hanging by strings on four branches. Each placed at four points as if to create balance. In fact the woman told me that is exactly what it does, creates balance. They read about it in a oriental horticulture book. The tree planted there before died. They couldn’t get one to root there. The book said that by balancing the tree and weighting it down, the tree would have a better chance of survival.

In my mind the four corners of a balanced , successful life are as follows: Spiritual, family, personal and professional. They are in fact in order of importance.

Just like the tree, when we learn to balance our lives our roots grow stronger. We open ourselves to the nourishment that a balanced life provides and the fruits of our efforts are abundant in all four areas. Strong roots help us to stand tall against the most destructive storms.

- Written by Bob Perks http://www.bobperks.com.

What are your dreams and goals? This isn’t what you already have or what you have done, but what you want. Have you ever really sat down and thought through your life values and decided what you really want? Have you ever taken the time to truly reflect, to listen quietly to your heart, to see what dreams live within you? Your dreams are there. Everyone has them. They may live right on the surface, or they may be buried deep from years of others telling you they were foolish, but they are there.

So how do we know what our dreams are? This is an interesting process and it relates primarily to the art of listening. This is not listening to others; it is listening to yourself. If we listen to others, we hear their plans and dreams (and many will try to put their plans and dreams on us). If we listen to others, we can never be fulfilled. We will only chase elusive dreams that are not rooted deep within us. No, we must listen to our own hearts.

Let’s take a look at some practical steps/thoughts on hearing from our hearts on what our dreams are:

Take time to be quiet. This is something that we don’t do enough in this busy world of ours. We rush, rush, rush, and we are constantly listening to noise all around us. The human heart was meant for times of quiet, to peer deep within. It is when we do this that our hearts are set free to soar and take flight on the wings of our own dreams! Schedule some quiet “dream time” this week. No other people. No cell phone. No computer. Just you, a pad, a pen, and your thoughts (you get to do this in the workbook exercises this week).

Think about what really thrills you. When you are quiet, think about those things that really get your blood moving. What would you LOVE to do, either for fun or for a living? What would you love to accomplish? What would you try if you were guaranteed to succeed? What big thoughts move your heart into a state of excitement and joy? When you answer these questions you will feel Great and you will be in the “dream zone.” It is only when we get to this point that we experience what Our dreams are!

Write down all of your dreams as you have them. Don’t think of any as too outlandish or foolish, remember, you’re dreaming! Let the thoughts fly and take careful record.

Here is the big picture: Life is too short to not pursue your dreams. Someday your life will near its end and all you will be able to do is look backwards. You can reflect with joy or regret. Those who dream, who set goals and act on them to live out their dreams are those who live lives of joy and have a sense of peace when they near the end of their lives. They have finished well, for themselves and for their families.

Remember: These are the dreams and goals that are born out of your heart and mind. These are the goals that are unique to you and come from who you were created to be and gifted to become. Your specific goals are what you want to attain because they are what will make your life joyful and bring your family’s life into congruence with what you want it to be.

To Your Success, Jim Rohn

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Article by Jim Rohn, America’s Foremost Business Philosopher. To subscribe to the Free Jim Rohn Weekly E-zine go to here.

Put another way, what are the most important tasks you have to complete to make the greatest contribution to your organization? To your family? To your life in general?

Think It Through Carefully

This is one of the most important questions you can ask and answer. What are your highest-value activities? First, think this through for yourself. Then, ask your boss. Ask your coworkers and subordinates. Ask your friends and family. Like focusing the lens of a camera, you must be crystal clear about your highest-value activities before you begin work.

Keep Yourself Focused

The second question you can ask continually is, “What can I, and only I, do that, if done well, will make a real difference?”

This is something that only you can do. If you don’t do it, it won’t be done by someone else. But if you do it, and you do it well, it can really make a difference to your life and your career. What is your answer to this question?

Every hour of every day, you can ask yourself this question and there will be a specific answer. Your job is to be clear about the answer and then to start and work on this task before anything else.

Action Exercises

First, make a list of everything you do at work and then select your most valuable tasks from that list.

Second, resolve to start in on your highest-value task and stay at it until it is 100 percent complete.

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Article by Brian Tracy

Get Brian Tracy’s 21 Success Secrets of Self-Made Millionaires for FREE! “Did you know that every 60 seconds someone else in the world becomes a Millionaire?” Wouldn’t it be great to know their secrets? Their formulas? The little-known facts? Well now you can - and ALL for FREE! Absolutely no commitments and no strings attached. Get it Get it here.

It really was crowded. I have no idea why. I was at the local mall on one of my getaway-from-it-all visits. When things begin to blur and my mind is nearly at a dead stop, I know it’s time to take a break. In the winter I head for the mall.

It goes back to my childhood when we would go window shopping on a Saturday evening just to get out of the house for a while. We also sat in our car at a local shopping center munching on a favorite treat and just watching people as they walked by.

So sitting in the mall is a comfortable place for me. I don’t stay long. You’ll never see me slumped over snoring like some of the old guys. I don’t gather with others in conversation nor do I bring a deck of cards and sit in the food court. I re-energize and move on.

Today though, my people watching skills we at a peak. The place was buzzing.

There were three benches gathered together facing each other and I was fortunate to find one spot at the end.

There was a mix of people of all ages. And a constant flow of shoppers passing by.

Suddenly there was a bit of a ruckus. A beautiful young girl appearing to be about 12 years old approached a woman sitting on the bench nearby me. The woman said, “Why don’t you sit with me for a while?” She seemed quiet and a bit reflective at first glance, but suddenly started to moan and whine about things. There obviously wasn’t room for her and she became quite upset.

“But where do I fit in? There’s nowhere for me to be. I just want to be…be somebody…be happy…belong!” the young girl said.

There was more to this than not having a seat on the bench. This was a young lady struggling to discover who she was and where she belonged.

I was about to offer my seat to her when an older gentleman sitting next to the woman got up and left. I think he just didn’t want to get involved.

But if you know me by now, I saw this as an opportunity to jump right in.

“It’s not just a seat you’re looking for is it?” I said as I looked at the young girl.

“What? Are you talking to me?” she said.

“Yes, I am.”

“No, it’s not just a seat.”

“I can’t tell you I remember being your age. But I can tell you that somewhere about that time is when I started to hurt.”

“You hurt? Was there something wrong?”

“Not hurt in a physical, somebody-beat-me-up kind of way. But I hurt all over because I wanted to fit in with life. Not just friends, but the world. Not just school, but when I looked in the mirror. I wanted to see me. I didn’t even know who that was I was looking at.”

“Mom, see he knows how I feel,” she said as she turned toward the lady next to her.

“Sir, I’ve been telling her the same thing. But because I’m her Mom, it doesn’t sound the same. It sounds like criticism,” the woman said.

“I know. I have two sons. I am trying to find an interpreter who speaks ‘youth,’” I said with a laugh.

“So I’ll struggle with this forever?” she asked me.

“No. You’ll struggle now until you realize the value of the search for the real you. Believe it or not this is a good thing. You are like a rose. Until now you were just a small bud developing and growing. Now you are starting to bloom, open up. These outside petals are the questions you just asked. ” where do I fit in?, I just want to be…be somebody…be happy…belong!” You are just opening up to the beauty that’s inside you,” I said.

“But maybe I don’t want to be a rose,” she said smartly.

“Great! Then start with that. Ask yourself, “If I were a flower what would I want to be?” Then be it!

Excellent! Don’t settle for a rose. Be a petunia, a daisy, a violet! Then think how that flower lives. How does it grow? What does it need to grow? How does it possibly get so beautiful when it started out from nothing?”

“But I’ve been growing too long!” she said.

Then I shared this story:

“In the far East the people plant a tree called the Chinese bamboo. During the first four years they water and fertilize the plant with seemingly little or no results. Then the fifth year they again apply water and fertilizer. In five weeks’ time the tree grows 90 feet.”

“Wow” she said.

“Now my question to you is, did it grow 90 feet in five weeks or five years?”

She thought for a moment and then with a relaxing sigh quietly said, “Five years.”

“I’ve decided that I don’t want to be a flower at all. I want to be a bamboo!”

We all laughed. The young girl turned and hugged her mom. I stood up and said my goodbyes and as I turned around to look at them one more time, I swear when the young girl stood up, she looked so much taller. I think perhaps she grew up a little today.

But we never stop growing.

- Written by Bob Perks http://www.bobperks.com.

Since that time I’ve been working on my own personal development. And I must admit that this has been the most challenging assignment of all. This business of personal development lasts a lifetime.

You see, what you become is far more important than what you get. The important question to ask on the job is not, “What am I getting?” Instead, you should ask, “What am I becoming?” Getting and becoming are like Siamese twins: What you become directly influences what you get. Think of it this way: Most of what you have today you have attracted by becoming the person you are today.

I’ve also found that income rarely exceeds personal development. Sometimes income takes a lucky jump, but unless you learn to handle the responsibilities that come with it, it will usually shrink back to the amount you can handle.

It is hard to keep that which has not been obtained through personal development

So here’s the great axiom of life:

–To Have More Than You’ve Got, Become More Than You Are–

This is where you should focus most of your attention. Otherwise, you just might have to contend with the axiom of not changing, which is:

–Unless You Change How You Are, You’ll Always Have What You’ve Got–

To Your Success, Jim Rohn

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Article by Jim Rohn, America’s Foremost Business Philosopher. To subscribe to the Free Jim Rohn Weekly E-zine go to here.

The Law of Attraction

In essence, when we discuss charisma, we are talking about the law of attraction. This law has been stated in many different ways down through the centuries, but it basically says that you inevitably attract into your life the people and circumstances that harmonize with your dominant thoughts.

You Are A Living Magnet

In a sense, you are a living magnet, and you are constantly radiating thought waves, like a radio station radiates sound waves, that are picked up by other people. Your thoughts, intensified by your emotions, as radio waves are intensified by electric impulses, go out from you and are picked up by anyone who is tuned in to a similar wavelength. You then attract into your life people, ideas, opportunities, resources, circumstances and anything else that is consistent with your dominant frame of mind.

The law of attraction also explains how you can build up your levels of charisma so that you can have a greater and more positive impact on the people whose cooperation, support and affection you desire.

The critical thing to remember about charisma is that it is largely based on perception. It is based on what people think about you. It is not so much reality as it is what people perceive you to be. For example, one person can create charisma in another person by speaking in glowing terms about that person to a third party. If you believe that you are about to meet an outstanding and important person, that person will tend to have charisma for you.

Mother Teresa of Calcutta

One of the most charismatic people in the world was Mother Teresa of Calcutta. In a physical sense, she was a quiet, elderly, frail woman in poor health, and she wore a modest nun’s habit. She might have been ignored by a person passing her on the street, were it not for the tremendous charisma she developed and for the fact that her appearance was so well-known to so many people as a result.

How Would You Feel?

If someone told you that he was going to introduce you to a brilliant, self-made millionaire who was very quiet and unassuming about his success, you would almost naturally imbue that person with charisma, and in his presence, you would not act the same as you would if you had been told nothing at all. Charisma begins largely in the mind of the beholder.

Lasting charisma depends more upon the person you really are than upon just the things you do.

Continually look for ways to improve other’s perceptions of you so that you can be more influential with them. Be a living magnet.

Action Exercises

Here are two things you can do immediately to put these ideas into action.

First, be clear about the messages you are sending and the perceptions you are creating in others. Are these perceptions consistent with the impressions you want to make?

Second, see yourself and imagine yourself every day as an important powerful and charming person. Treat others as you would if you were already strong, famous and influential.

———————-
Article by Brian Tracy

Get Brian Tracy’s 21 Success Secrets of Self-Made Millionaires for FREE! “Did you know that every 60 seconds someone else in the world becomes a Millionaire?” Wouldn’t it be great to know their secrets? Their formulas? The little-known facts? Well now you can - and ALL for FREE! Absolutely no commitments and no strings attached. Get it Get it here.

We teach our children “honesty is the best policy.” This applies to how we deal with our children as much as it does expecting them to be honest with us. When it comes to your child’s self-esteem, he or she will know or be able to sense if you are not being honest. For example, if art is not your child’s top skill, don’t say that his or her drawing is the best you’ve ever seen. Your child will know it’s not, and will not believe you the next time you say something meant to be positive, no matter how honest it is. Instead, tell your child something genuine about the piece or the effort. Make non-judgmental statements such as, “You really used your imagination in making the flowers many different colors.” This simply states your observation, rather than a false statement.

Also, understand that your child and your child’s behavior are two separate things. This can be very hard to remember, particularly when your child is acting out in ways that make you crazy or that are unsafe. However, when you discipline your child for the behavior rather than the person, you can positively influence and foster self esteem. Why? If your child feels that you are mad, because of who he or she is as a person rather than for the behavior, this can negatively affect your child’s self-esteem. Using “I” statements helps with this. Say something like, “I don’t like it when you leave your toys scattered all over the floor,” which also addresses the behavior, rather than, “You are a slob,” which attacks their character.

Let your child make some decisions. Children are in a situation where everyone else is constantly telling them what to do, when to do it, where to go, and more. When children are allowed to make some choices, even if it’s something small, they learn to be self-reliant. You don’t want your children growing up feeling dependent on others for direction. Simple choices such as what to wear (you can offer two or three choices) or choosing a special lunch item will foster your child’s being able to think independently.

These are, of course, only a few things you can do to help develop your child’s self-confidence. The important thing to remember is that it is an ongoing process. The little things do add up, even if they seem unimportant. This can be helpful to keep in mind, particularly when something as important as developing your child’s self esteem feels like a monumental task. It doesn’t have to be! Taking time to recognize your child for the wonderful person he or she is, combined with a few techniques and consistency will go a long way toward raising a healthy, confident adult.

Attitude determines how much of the future we are allowed to see. It decides the size of our dreams and influences our determination when we are faced with new challenges. No other person on earth has dominion over our attitude. People can affect our attitude by teaching us poor thinking habits or unintentionally misinforming us or providing us with negative sources of influence, but no one can control our attitude unless we voluntarily surrender that control.

No one else “makes us angry.” We make ourselves angry when we surrender control of our attitude. What someone else may have done is irrelevant. We choose, not they. They merely put our attitude to a test. If we select a volatile attitude by becoming hostile, angry, jealous or suspicious, then we have failed the test. If we condemn ourselves by believing that we are unworthy, then again, we have failed the test.

If we care at all about ourselves, then we must accept full responsibility for our own feelings. We must learn to guard against those feelings that have the capacity to lead our attitude down the wrong path and to strengthen those feelings that can lead us confidently into a better future.

If we want to receive the rewards the future holds in trust for us, then we must exercise the most important choice given to us as members of the human race by maintaining total dominion over our attitude. Our attitude is an asset, a treasure of great value, which must be protected accordingly. Beware of the vandals and thieves among us who would injure our positive attitude or seek to steal it away.

Having the right attitude is one of the basics that success requires. The combination of a sound personal philosophy and a positive attitude about ourselves and the world around us gives us an inner strength and a firm resolve that influences all the other areas of our existence.

To Your Success, Jim Rohn

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Article by Jim Rohn, America’s Foremost Business Philosopher. To subscribe to the Free Jim Rohn Weekly E-zine go to here.

Your Main Energy Source

Here’s the important point. Positive emotions give you energy, while negative emotions deplete your energy. When you are excited and happy and are interacting with people you love and enjoy, you sparkle with energy and enthusiasm. When you are angry or depressed, or negative for any reason, you feel tired and frustrated and, eventually, burned out.

You Burn A Lot of Energy

It takes 1,000 units of physical energy to operate your body and you do not do physical labor, that physical energy can be refined in your body to produce 100 units of emotional energy.

Emotional energy is a far more refined form of energy, and it is absolutely essential to healthy emotional functioning.

Creating Mental Energy

If you do not consume all your energy units in the expression of negative emotions, such as fear, doubt, anger, and resentment, your emotional energies are conserved. If your energy is conserved at one level, your body continues to refine it into higher and better energy. 100 units of emotional energy thus conserved will be refined by your body into 10 units of mental energy.

Anger Is A Killer

You’ve probably heard someone described as “shaking with anger.” When a person is shaking with anger, it is an indication that he has burned up the glucose or sugar-based energy in his system, and he is actually weak from his angry outburst.

The Benefits of Pausing

All successful people are very productive. They work longer hours and they work better hours. They get a lot more done than the average person. They get paid more and promoted faster. They are highly respected and esteemed by everyone around them. They become leaders and role models. Inevitably, they rise to the top of their fields and to the top of their income ranges, and so can you.

Don’t Take Things Personally

They stand back and refuse to take things personally. They do not allow themselves to get drawn into arguments or other people’s problems. They save their energy for more productive purposes.

The whole purpose of physical relaxation is to allow yourself to recharge your emotional and mental batteries. You don’t engage in physical relaxation so much to relax your physical body because it’s likely you don’t work that hard with your body.

The aim of rest and relaxation is more to build up your mental and emotional energies and thereby improve the overall quality of your life.

Another characteristic of very successful people is that they keep themselves calm much longer than the average person does. They are more relaxed, more genial, and more in control of their emotions. They are very aware that expressions of negative emotion deprive them of the energy they need to be effective in the more important things they do. They don’t allow themselves to become upset or angry over little things, or even over large things. They remain objective and detached.

Action Exercises

Here are three things you can do immediately to put these ideas into action:

First, keep your thoughts on your dreams and goals, and keep them off of the things and people that cause you stress and negative emotions. This is not easy, but it’s very important.

Second, preserve your emotional energy by staying calm and positive in difficult situations rather than allowing yourself to be upset or angry.

Third, take ample time to rest completely so you can recharge your physical and emotional batteries. The better rested you are, the more effective you will be.

———————-
Article by Brian Tracy

Get Brian Tracy’s 21 Success Secrets of Self-Made Millionaires for FREE! “Did you know that every 60 seconds someone else in the world becomes a Millionaire?” Wouldn’t it be great to know their secrets? Their formulas? The little-known facts? Well now you can - and ALL for FREE! Absolutely no commitments and no strings attached. Get it Get it here.

Landis was not the fastest or the strongest bike racer, but he more than compensated for his average athletic ability with psychology.

On one occasion, before a big race in a strange town, Landis purchased twenty medals and pinned them to his racing uniform. He arrived at the race already looking like a repeat champion, and so completely intimidated his rivals that he won the race.

You might not be the strongest, or the slimmest, or the best-looking gentleman in any given situation, at any given moment. But if you enter a room with the attitude that you are the best, you will be treated as such.

This neither means pinning medals to your clothes nor being condescending to others. It simply means conveying the attitude of a noble and successful winner.

And that is what the ladies will respect and the men will envy.

(thanks to Sam Spade)